Blog

Deception’s banner is, “I’m OK, you’re nuts;” because it can’t afford to be wrong. What is self-deception? How can you deceive yourself? Is it like telling yourself a joke and then laughing at it? Well, let’s take a look. I suspect deception is about unawareness. Deception wants to be left alone. It hides, even behind […]

Last time in Part One we introduced six building blocks to creating a stepfamily that lasts. Develop trust among family members by creating an atmosphere where it is safe to disclose and be vulnerable. Develop clear family goals and identify obstacles to growth. Address the inability to have healthy conflict. Increase buy-in and commitment by […]

Americans are enamored with marriage-especially getting married. Nearly three-quarters of us marry by our 35th birthday. And when we fail, we do not give up. As many as half of all marriages end in divorce, but three out of four of those divorced people will marry again, typically within two years-or less!! Four out of […]

Many stepfamilies begin life as a fractured group of wounded people. In fact, a defining characteristic of all stepfamilies is that they are born of loss. Changes are happening that make everyone uncomfortable. There is a conspicuous lack of trust. Motives and actions are suspect. Family members are disconnected; sometimes feeling like strangers. Interactions are […]

Divorce is hard on children; few dispute this. The irony is that the very people who have hurt our children are the ones who can and must help them heal-that would be you and me. We hold the key to our children’s pain, but also to their healing. The problem is that we too grew […]